Is that *ALL* for you?
The title of this post is brought to you by a story I heard during my morning commute. The morning DJ on one of the stations I listen to related a story about his experience when picking up food for his wife and him last night. His wife stayed out in the car with their dog while he ran in to get their food. The woman (unsure of age) who rang up his order evidently looked at him and asked, “Is that *ALL* for you?” He affirmed that she had indeed asked the quesiton in *that* special tone that shows disdain and disgust to whom she was speaking. He seemed flabbergasted that she would ask him something like that. (I should add that I have no idea what this DJ looks like, so he very well might be fat.) I took it from his response that he’s not used to being talked to in that manner.
I hate to tell you this, Mr. Morning DJ, some of us fat folks hear *that* tone all the time. When we order food, we are regularly asked questions like that or given the look of utter disgust that seems to attempt to humiliate and ridicule us without uttering a word. And the person who asks the question (or gives us that look) thinks it’s completely and utterly acceptable to question our food choice or portion size. Never mind that we might be picking up multiple meals for our family or for a get-together at home. No, a fat person like me is automatically assumed to be eating it all by myself.
There is no shortage of people who think it’s acceptable to offer dieting advice or to make comments like “You should eat less” or “Eating less and exercising more, that’s the key” as if we fat folks must not know how to be NOT fat. But that’s just it – that advice doesn’t work. If it did, there’d be very few, if any, fat people in the world. The truth of the matter is that diets DO NOT work. I can speak on that topic from experience. I’ve tried (and failed) too many diets to count.
But I digress…let’s return to those “helpful” people who feel uninhibited when passing along healthful advice that’s really all about helping us be NOT fat. It’s not okay to do that. It’s rude and shows a lack of respect to the fat person. No matter what my size, I have the right to be treated with courtesy and respect. I’ve started fighting for that right, too. Enough with the passivity; it’s time to be assertive and ask that I be treated with the same courtesy and respect afforded those of a smaller size. This goes out to all the food service employees, grocery store employees, doctors and doctors’ office staff members, along with people in the general public. Learn to show respect for all people of all sizes.