A Resolution for Life

I’ll confess to a bad habit I frequently indulge in – I frequently give a flying rat’s a$$ about what people might think of me and my fat body. Mentally, I wonder what others around me think when they see me. There are times when I can see it clearly in their faces because they have no filter or don’t care to use it. And there are times when I let what strangers think of my body impact what I think of myself. Today is the day to take that bold step of making a resolution to stop giving a flying rat’s a$$ what anyone else thinks of me. That means I stop worrying about the opinion of everyone from my husband and my friends to complete strangers. This includes positive opinions from those who love me, as well as negative opinions from complete strangers. I can smile and say thank you to the compliments from my loved ones without letting those words send my self-worth flying high, just as I can ignore or spit out a pithy reply to those who try to humiliate me without letting their negative opinion tank my self-worth.

This not only relieves me from speculating what others think of me and how that impacts my self-worth, but it puts full responsibility on my shoulders for my self-worth. I can look myself in the mirror, declare the day a good day, and do my part to make it so without having to worry about outside influences over which I have no control anyway. And if someone thinks less of me as a person because I’m fat? Well, the blunt fact of the matter is their opinion is their problem, not mine. It’s a problem with their way of thinking, not mine.

By doing this, I am taking two of Don Miguel Ruiz’s four agreements and combining them. I am not taking it personally and I am not making assumptions. If I think that everyone who sees me is mentally calling me derogatory fat names, that’s a pretty huge assumption to make. Perhaps they have; perhaps they haven’t. If I stop assuming they’re doing that, then there is nothing to take personally. If I stop taking that assumption personally, then what they do or do not think about me has no impact on me.

This step is taking responsibility for myself and what I think of myself and not letting others do the thinking for me. I mentioned in another post that this is an ongoing battle, but I believe this is a battle well worth fighting and winning. So, starting right here and right now, I relinquish all others from any responsibility for my self-worth. From this point on, only I will be responsible for my self-worth.

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